Joe Hart’s Itchy Scalp

Yes, Joe Hart is now the undisputed patron saint of the itchy scalp, and the advertising gurus at Head & Shoulders have no doubt paid him a small fortune for it. Which is just as well for him. Because he’ll now receive so much abuse and derision from opposing supporters he’ll probably need the money to hire some 24/7 personal protection.

England’s No 1 actually gives rather a nice performance in the glossy UK version of this ad. He is first seen clutching his head as if mortally injured, before we see the club physio trot on and give the boy a quick shampoo before the ref can restart the game. It would be funnier if it wasn’t so close to the truth. Our footballers are now so pampered that I think few supporters would be surprised if this actually happened in the middle of a Manchester derby. Van Persie and Co. are now so oiled, preened and cosseted that it’s about the only treatment they don’t receive on the pitch.

I wonder why they didn’t pick Wayne Rooney for this particular campaign. Oh, wait…